From soap to fame "the Wynonna interview"

Lord and savior Miss Wade has been up to her eye balls in new found fame. Just this week she interviewed Wynonna Judd. Yes you heard right your humble servant of the lord interviewed the 5 time Grammy winner Wynonna Judd. you can find the interview here http://www.metrojacksonville.com/mobile/article/2014-dec-wynonna-judd-interview-with-karrissa-wade . What a fun down to earth diva. I have followed her career from the time I was in vacation bible school. I was awe struck to speak to her. I got the feeling she had heard of my work with the good book. I went back to the den of iniquity ( Florida Theatere ) to see this icon. What a concert . Children if ya ever get the chance to see her . The lord would approve. I only had to clutch my pearls once the entire time as a homeless man approached me for change . This shady character came towards me at the theatere what was a lady to do? I reached in my purse and grabbed my anointed pepper spray blessed by the pastor himself and sprayed generously into the eyes of this man with lust on his mind. He went down like a televangelist caught with a a twelve year old mulatto boy. You can imagine my surprise when it was just a valued member of the theatere staff wanting to usher me to the back to meet Mrs Judd. The man went on and on abut pressing charges. Miss wade doesn't see what the fuss is about . The blast was not as painful as child birth or the sermons at first Baptist. Well luckily I had my good orthopedics on and fled the scene. Keep Miss Wade in your prayers children . She may be writing next post from the Duval correctional facility for wayward women. Until next time my followers in Christ , bless ya bye.

Miss Wade Consents to Soil Her Name in order to Aid Local Theatre

Miss Wade makes the following announcement with hopes that she will not face the judgmental scorn of her congregation of fellow believers.

But on balance, she feels that the needs of charity are more important than strict observance to Man's Law and will make her decisions based on God's instead.

The Florida Theatre, a veritable institution in the Downtown Area where Miss Wade has spent so much time on her knees,….(praying for a better future) is in dire need.  Even more need than the poor washer women who run The Norm in riverside. (apparently there aren't as many ladies who need ironing done anymore).

So they requested that Miss Wade, the First Lady of Jacksonville, should host a vintage movie premier in order to raise funds for underprivileged children.

What could be more harmless than a vintage movie, Miss Wade wondered.  Without examining the contract (during which Miss Wade was robbed, strictly speaking) too closely (she was more focused on getting rolled by the theatre 'negotiators'.) she had no idea what kind of film was being presented.

Other than it being related to the Halloween Season.

It was only after Miss Wade had already committed her word that she discovered that the so called 'woman from transylvania' was actually a 'drag queen' (where DO they come up with these words, Miss Wade wonders) in other words, nothing more than a man wearing pearls, and apparently a lot of black underthings.

At first Miss Wade considering demurring.  Simply canceling the entire thing on grounds of moral turpitude.

But on second thought, she feels that there is probably no crowd in more need of a moral example (and a lot of supervision) than the kind of dregs she imagines will be at this 'performance'.

And so, in that Spirit, your faithful servant will be appearing at The Florida Theatre.  She will be packing a bible big enough to overcome the devil himself (in her girdle…..near the top) and girding herself in the Word, and the Spirit.

If Miss Wade is sacrificed by the followers of Ba'al, gentle reader,  you at least, will know what happened to her.

Please come to this event and rescue your heroine, just in case this too terrible to contemplate situation unfolds. It happens on October 25th, 2014, and will be followed by what has been described as a prayer meeting at an exhibition hall called 'The Metro" in the Riverside Neighborhood of Jacksonville.

You can buy your tickets at the door (which will be selling before the show begins promptly at 8) or through the "Ticketmaster" option.

Please pray with me for the strength to see this through.

Miss Wade simply cannot imagine what might happen with a bunch of boys dressed up in black lady things running amok in her beloved downtown.

She would much prefer that these types be confined to nice places, where privacy is guaranteed.

Yours in Christ.

Miss Karrissa Wade
The First Lady Of Jacksonville.

Can Pam Bondi be?

US State Attorney General Pam Bondi has said once again she will fight for the sanctity of marriage. Though Pam Bondi herself is working on her third strike at marriage. She assures us allowing gays to marry would destroy the sanctity of marriage. Rumors have been flying the past few weeks that Pam Bondi herself might be a Lesbian. Could this be? Could the woman fighting so diligently to keep so many happy gay couples unwed actually be a closeted lesbian? This would make sense to why a seemingly semi intelligent woman would close her eyes and ears to the people she represents. Her wardrobe would give a light hint of yes. I mean those sensible shoes, the horrible hair cut, and the make up skills of a Ebola monkey. They just scream certified card carrying member of the Home Depot Coalition. Is it possible she's doing a reverse Ann Heche? Is she acting? Pretending to be something she is not? Rumors over the last couple weeks have been flying around of Pam Bondi being seen several places with a close friend of the same sex. Who is this person? Sordid mistress or close colleague? question I for one want to know . I called the local republican party conveniently at 3730 beach Blvd. 904-396-4233 at first I was hung up on. my second call was transferred to a young woman and was told no comment. What lurks behind this veil of secrecy? Join me next week as I search into city council woman Kimberly Daniels politician or chucabrah ?

Dear Miss Wade

Recently everyone has decided it is Miss Wades job to hear all their problems. Children I have problems of my own. Do I look like Anne Landers? Try having ya good praying knee go out while trying to worship our sweet baby Jesus. You know how sister Catherine is always trying one up me. You know the one with store bought hair and the Publix pie . She always says is home made. How can I compete if i can even kneel? And don't get me started on relations, that old Abner still trying get relations .At my age if there's a warm feeling in my lady parts I better check my depends . Talking about there's still a sex life after 6o. why yes last time i thought i was having sex i realized i had rolled over on my right breast. It had be sex or a stroke. I bought a push up bra recently push up bra hmmph , looked like i had shoulder pads in my best Sunday dress. One deacons kids asking me if i played foot ball. Wanted get a autograph. Well I digress , my point is not everyone wants hear ya troubles. When someone says how are you its being polite. Same thing as saying "oh bless your heart" really means who cares. well love and light children . I gotta go get Abner away from TV . Every time he watches those dang work out videos he gets heart palpitations . Then its realtions talk all over again. Bless ya bye. Miss Wade

Any fool can wear a crown.. but wearing while having sex now thats talent.

Lord how mercy everyone has got the pageant bug right now . No not that bug although there are crown chasers to. Miss Wade recently was down in Cocoa where she was ministering to the wayward teenage boys. Teaching them the verse spare the rod spoil the child. Hallelujah. She was slapped by the pageant mosquito. I don't know if it was vodka or Jesus . Next thing I know Miss Wade was bringing down the house winning 4 out of 5 categories. She just wanted take time to thank everyone. For talent She juggled three Siamese twin transsexuals while eating a jello pudding pop. Everyone loves jello. After working her fist up one of the midgets she proceeded to lip-sync " Our God is a awesome God ". She commenced to twirling a flaming baton as the little person caught it in his mouth. When she sobered up and exercised the demons . All Miss Wade could hear was "you been a very bad boy ahahha" . She broke out her anointing oil and started to spray the judges . The head judge assumed it was a golden shower and begin twerking his nipples. We got Miss Wade home where she is recuperating clutching her pearls and muttering something about dens of iniquity . She has yet to let go of her crown . Prayers and anointing to you all . Bless ya bye. Miss Space Coast Comedy Queen.

The oldest living drag queen has gone....

Its with sad heart Miss Wade must say good bye to a dear friend and daughter Blossom Otoole. Blossum was our first Miss Big Boned and Bossy. From scandal to stardom you never knew what she was gonna do. She often was serving "hot nuts at the local hotspots" .She loved being a "prison bitch" and you better believe she would ask "wanna see my pussy" to any man with a pulse. Its a sad time for the community . We say good bye and celebrate her life starting this sunday at Incahoots. Sunday the 9th at the Norm and Metro on Sunday the 16th. We can all can see her now with James Brown, Mike Burton , and many more in her white underwear kicking up her heels to "I just wanna fucking dance" . You will be missed old friend , daughter and star. Always keep them smiling Miss Big Boned , Miss Firecracker love ya momma...

Holidays Gays and the Baby Jesus

Miss Wade loves the Holidays about our Lord. Recently at charity fundraiser for needy children Miss Wade discovered the homosexuals were sculling the good name of the baby Jesus. Did you know the gays even call each other Mary? The very name of our lord and Savior . I clutch my pearls as I think of all the yule tides that have become gay. There is even a drag queen at Hamburger Marys who hosts a x-rated bingo and calls the winning prize " dildos for Jesus" . Now Miss Wade knows the good book of our savior , and never ever has Corinthians mentioned gods work with Latex. Did David slay Goliath with a vibrator? Did Moses part the Red sea with a giant black double headed dildo? Now don't get me wrong I have read the verse "spare the rod spoil the child" . now as you know Christians do not take anything form the good book out of text. the good book says love thy neighbor . During this holiest of holidays Miss Wade is loving and praying for the souls of those sinful bingo goers . Join her in protest every Tuesday at Hamburger Marys at 7:30 . The only vibrating and thumping Miss Wade will be doing is shouts of jubilation for the good lord and holy spirit. Happy birthday baby Jesus.